Monday, May 24, 2010

Hello my small amount of readers! So this week marks the end of my junior year in high school, and I am happy to be a senior at last! Today my mother and I went to Dawsonville, Ga to see her Fiancé. We had a lovely time with him out there and we loved having our long conversations and debates over the universe and how it works. On the way home my mother talked over an array of items, such as: Open relationships, sex, real love, etc. I can be totally open with my mom and she is with me, and thats my topic for this week. Relationships with your parents.
"God! She always makes me so mad! What is her problem?"
She loves you. That is her problem. She wants you to know that she cares. If you had something happen who would be there? Your parents correct? You'd want them there to help you through the tough times. They are the ultimate love. The love that will transcend time and space. They make you mad, but they do it knowing that it might help you. They want what is best for you and if stopping you, or barging in, or the other annoying things they do are neccesary then by God let them do it! The love from parent to child is just astounding. They care with a depth that makes the Marianas Trench look shallow.
"If She/He cares so much why do they always yell at me"
Again because they love you. They want you to see what you are doing might be dumb and uncalled for. Most of the things they do boils down to love and a striving for you to better yourself. If You can make something better because they helped than they will feel like they succeeded as parents. That little joy is a big deal. Yelling is a sign of love, and sorry kids but usually you have it coming. Thats just usually the fact.
Not all parents are the same. My dad and I have a rocky relationship, but my mom and I are close, VERY CLOSE. She and I can be totally honest, and not every kid gets that. But wouldn't it be amazing to set aside petty fights and be honest with your parents? They will be there and always love you. The love you more than you know. Appreciate it. Love them back. Talk to them. The best parent advice I can give you is that you need to not let the fights ruin that love. Stop fighting and tell them that you want to discuss it and then talk it out. Love is forever, and thats honestly what a parent can do for you. Love you.
I sound like a broken record, but hey facts are facts. Thank you for reading. If you have any topics that you want me to post about message me at reach.zach.davis@gmail.com. You will remain anonymous, Unless you want to have your name posted with it. Again thank you for reading. Send friends to this blog if you think it can help them too. Thank You For The third time. Have a wonderful Life!

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Hello my small amount of readers. I hope all is well on and outside of cyber space. So I have been going through a phase of change with how my friends and I are getting along. It seems that the drama levels grow as the year ends summer springs upon us once again. It may just be me, but my friends are changing. Some not for the better. Let us gander at the things that I have been noticing.
"When did she start talking to them?"
You will notice that some of your friends will abandon you for other groups. Abandon is a very harsh word, but I have learned that most of the time that is true. They leave your group to join ones that they feel they can connect to better. Some of the time this is due to relationships. She fell for him, he was not of this clan, she and he made a bond. Some of the time the groups will mesh and they will create one super group. Others it is not so pretty. It could tear apart friendships and make them choose sides. That is kind of not fair. If it comes down to love or selfish territorial disputes. Than let the love win. It will make life easier.
"She/ He looks so odd. When did she/ he start dressing like that?"
Again this is a relationship thing. If you want to assimilate into a group then you dress and act as they do. That is just the basics of monkey see monkey do. If one ape sees another do something they like, they mimic the way the other ape did it. Just be careful not to catch bad habits. Some of the changes high schoolers go through are just plain sad. She is addicted to smoking, he can't stop having sex. Those things are kind of changes that can be caused by a changing of the group.
Changes happen, but when you lose someone close to you it is very hard. Something to think about. If you helped them then, would they help you now? I see it now all to often that when someone helps you then, they wont help you now. Why? They aren't apart of the group, there for not a part of your life. I think that if that friendship means enough to you, your friendship will transcend the limits of distance, changes, or any obstacle. What is a life with out friends?
Salvage what you can of any friendship. Changes happens, but friends can and should be forever. I am sorry that this is not a longer blog. But I felt that it wasn't in need of a lengthy explanation. Thank you for reading. If you have any topics you would like me to cover, message me at reach.zach.davis@gmail.com.

Until then. Thank you for reading.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Hello my small amount of readers. I have been sick and had some laziness so this is my first post in quite a bit. I have had the joy of seeing an amazing speaker this week. He was a very old soul who has had it rough. He was a survivor of the Holocaust. He was in Austria at the beginning of the war. His father was sent away to a forced labor camp. He told a large group of high schoolers his story, and how his life was shaped with the love of total strangers. It was a very touching story.
He was in his twenties at the time. His father was an accountant, but was forced into a labor camp. He was offered a job in a factory that built war supplies. Once he was accepted to the job he had to leave his home and go to live near his job. As he was off to the job he didn't have any idea that he was never going to see the rest of his family ever again. As he left the house his grandmother approached him, she had someone who she wanted him to meet. It was a priest. He placed a prayer shawl over his head and said a prayer. After that he left and was off on to the job.
Bombs attacked the building all the time. Air raids attacked the factory trying to stop the building of tanks and other war time goods. During one of the air raids he went to the factory shelter to be safe from the bombs. A man told him that there was no room for a Jew in the shelter. He was struck with some fire and some other pieces of bomb in the chest.
He made it by the war by the skin of his teeth. He was helped by many strangers. One was a woman who saw him marching with a group of Russians. She informed him that they were marching to Siberia, by the time he was done talking the group was gone. She saved him from a horrid winter. Another person to help him was a stranger. He had no where to stay and this man let him into his home and feed him and gave him a place to stay for the night.
After he had told us of his life and his travels we got to ask him questions. Being known for questions I raised my hand and asked the first question. "Did seeing the horrors of what was happening in that war affect your faith?" He answered No. He stated that he thinks that the only thing that saved him from death was a God. He explained that he would never hate a god who was not in control. God was sacred and if he did it than he would not question. He still thanks that priest for the blessing that he placed over him, he attributes that blessing to his safety today.
He was a truly beautiful human being. He kept telling us that he would never lose his faith. Even with death of many he loved, after he lost it all, he had a stronger faith than before. It is amazing to know that God was not lost in all that turmoil. The Holocaust was a very traumatic thing for many, and many lost all faith in God. Knowing that some people got closer because of it makes me certain that God is still a force in this world.
I will not press religion on anyone, I have no right to. I am not a religious person. What ever God or Goddess or what ever you believe you should know that your higher power is always with you. Even in your darkest hour you are always held in the arms of your savior. If a man who has lost it all, lost his people, lost his family , can still have his faith. You can have yours. Listen to your Gods words and let him into you and let him be a shoulder you can cry on. Religion is a beautiful but scary thing. Let it save you. Thank you for reading. I know this is not my usual self help post, but it was a real eye opener for me. If you have any topics that you want me to cover Email me at reach.zach.davis@gmail.com. Again thank you.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Hello my small amount of internet readers. Questions have been tossed my way again and I feel I should share them with you, as I would even if they were my own questions. Today a girl came up to me asking for advice on dating, I promptly responded with a question of my own. "What is there to know?" the girl looked at me shocked as if I had said something wrong. That is the question. What is there to know? I am no "Hitch" so take my advice on this with a grain of salt. So todays post will be on the joys and pain of dating.
"Does he like me?"
I wouldn't know. If you want to know if someone for sure likes you just ask them! Its scary, but your friends/ their friends probably aren't going to know either. If you want to know something for a paper do you beat around the bush? No! You go right to the source! That is the best way to get things done. The details are there you just can't trust other sites. This is a bold strategy, and it is scary. It could show that you really care, or see if they do.
"But what if she/he says no?"
Than they say no! That feeling of rejection is hard to take, but its just a word. You will hear it a million times before your life is over. Don't let one no ruin your life. Most of you are so young that it doesn't even matter! You need to not get worked up over one simple little word. If they say no, than move on. It is not worth crying over! Also! If you are waiting for an answer, Don't rush them. Dating takes a lot of thinking.
"Would y-you....wanna...g-go...o-o-out sometime....?"
Now, that question is the most terrifying question on the face of the planet. If you are being asked it, be honest. If you do want to go out than say yes! If you don't then don't say yes, but let them down easy. They got up the courage to ask, don't just drop them like a lead balloon. That makes you look rude, and that could sabotage your dating life. Yes, that is an answer that everyone likes to hear [most of the time] and if you are on the fence about going out on that date then say yes, see how it goes, then say yes to date two or no to it. Giving the benefit of the doubt. You never know whats going to happen. In summary, be honest.
"I heard she/he had three dates last weekend. Are you really gonna go?"
"Oh...than I don't want to be seen with him..."
Dear teenagers and your awful gossip, when will you learn that your gossip is just some rumor that you/others start and it makes you look like you have no respect. Sure he might have had three dates last weekend but do you know that he did? No. Your little comment there might have ruined the best time of someones life just because you think you know what that person is like. Gossip is probably the number two killer of relationships in the high school setting. Your little comments about her sex life, that probably aren't true, just made her lose the best man she might have ever had. Words are like toothpaste, once you say the words its hard to take them back.
"What about if she likes him, but he likes her, but she doesn't like him..."
Ok, that crap is annoying. If she/he likes her than why waste your time? You should see that that scary "love" food web just needs to be broken down to basics. You like him, if he doesn't like you than cut him off your web! If you don't then the web grows and makes this enormous mess of a chart of lust and love. Its very scary.
So this doesn't have a question to go with it, but its good things to know. If you know someone you like has a history of cheating or somethings you don't like, AKA being a player/hoe/etc. Than think about what they have done against what they have done thats good. If he cheats on three girls then wants you right after that scandal, its probably not a good idea to date quite yet. Dating takes trust, if you don't trust him than you don't date him! Simple right? Also be careful for the people who make you weak at the knees, but have a past of leading people on. Some people are just flirtatious. Don't fall for it all the time. Assume that thy are just being friendly. Getting your hopes up sucks and then being drops sucks worse.
"We like never talk now! Why?"
If you are dating someone and they are not talking to you, something might be up. Ask. Call and ask! They might need you more than you know. In hindsight they may also be not wanting you. So don't be pushy, but get the message across that you are concerned. Some people use not talking as anger, that is a bad thing. If they are mad and not talking to you than nothing will be resolved. No questions will be answered and the problem will linger. So talk it out! Communication is key in a relationship. Its how things can stay afloat. Not talking can also mean something bad for those who are in relationships. It may mean that your love is in danger. Make them talk to you about it.
I am not good with relationships by any means, but these are things that I have seen to work. I am not a "doctor of love" by any means, these are just what I think could be helpful things to know. Take it all with a grain of salt. If you have any questions or topics you would like me to post on, message me at Reach.zach.davis@gmail.com. I will keep you anonymous, unless you don't mind being named. Thank you for reading. Ta-ta for now.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Once again hello to the small amount of people who will actually follow me. What makes you want to get help? If you just in your head said "I don't know" think about this. If someone had to swim not knowing what to do, not getting the guidance needed to help them get to the edge. They would die wouldn't they. Asking someone what to do, or simply saying "I need help!" Can really change your life. If everyone didn't ask for help once in a while the world would hit a plateau and nothing would really happen. We would be stuck, unable to finish any tasks that could benefit mankind.
Why would you fear asking for help? Some people when they are so lost they can't even think of any way out they just shut down, but wouldn't a better alternative to that be to ask someone what to do? People don't ask for help because they don't want to look weak. Having a brain that sees that you are in trouble and need some advice doesn't make you weak. It makes you smarter than you know. Questions are what make the world happen. With out a question we would not have really anything. Questions are what define the world. If no one asks then it doesn't happen, or won't happen!
What is life without a helping hand? For some its an endless void of sadness. For others it makes them feel stronger, but that may come back to bite them. Help is defined as "to give or provide what is necessary to accomplish a task orsatisfy a need; contribute strength
or means to; renderassistance to; cooperate effectively with; aid; assist.." [Source found at the bottom of the page.]. Doesn't that sound like something that you would want if you were in some kind of turmoil? In my opinion, the strong are those who ask for help when they need it. Don't let your ego hold you from the truth!
If I am not weak for asking questions, why do people give me the "Your dumb for asking" look? They do that because they don't think they can help you. When someone comes to you to pour their heart out, panic can make a listening job hard! The thing to think about is to not let yourself bottle emotions til you hit the tipping point. If you let it out a little by little you will have no problems. You need to have a certain friend you can go to. That one friend that through thick and thin will make you feel better, but you need to be able to do the same for them. A friend in need is a friend indeed. That friend may be helping you today, but if you are not there when they need you...well than don't expect that friend to help you again.
How will I ask for help? Just sit down with someone you trust, pull them aside, ask them if they can listen and put in some feedback. The best thing you can do for someone or yourself is listen or be listened to! Just by letting the words flow you are letting the weight of holding them in off of you. Once that stress is gone you are free.
Sorry if a lot of my advice is very cliche. It may seem I am telling you the same thing that everyone does, but its the things that have worked for me. If you have any questions that you want me to cover, or have any topics that you want me to cover Email me at Reach.Zach.Davis@gmail.com. As stated before in my earlier posts, it will be anonymous unless you don't mind me making it public. Thank you for reading.

[This is my source for the definition earlier]
http://tinyurl.com/c8dmge

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Madness?

Hello to the small amount of people who will probably actually read this blog. I am new to the "blogging world" and I am just going to jump right in. For the last six years of my life I have been asking questions to myself, some of which are...well less than light hearted. Most of the questions are about death, love, and well normal teen angst. As I get out of this pubescent age I am seeing that most of the questions are answered in a plethora of ways. I will be blogging about the questions I ask and have been asked. This is post 1 of many, I hope you all find something in these posts helpful. Thank you in advance for reading.
Question one will address something that I know all to well. "Why am I not beautiful like she/he is?" This is the one question I have been asking and have been asked the most since I started middle school. To be honest, I don't know what makes them seem so amazing. Maybe its the charmed life, the beautiful flawless skin, or the perfect body. Something makes them beautiful. Just because someone is seemingly perfect doesn't make them beautiful. You can have the face of an angel but when you bleed its still red, when you cry your tears are still wet. They are just the same as you and I.
"Wow, she always has a smile on."
"Yea, she looks beautiful! Her life must be perfect"
Just because she is always smiling doesn't mean that her life is perfect. It actually might be a sign, when some people are in some kind of sad situation the way they try to fool everyone is smile. A smile is a beautiful sign of happiness, excitement, etc but it can also be a sign that something is up. something can be very wrong. Don't let emotions or physical things cloud your judgement! Just think, "Wow. She smiles all the time. I wonder what she is thinking"
"God I wish I looked like her/him! Her/His body is perfect."
The self esteem of a person should not be determined by what the other person looks like. That is just silly. I will admit to always looking at others and going "Damn...I look so ugly compared to them" but I am working on that. You body image is just what you look like. Whether you be black, white, fat, skinny, or any other form of adjective to describe the human body, you will always be the same in so many ways. She has pretty eyes, but you both bleed. He has a clear face, but you both feel the same pain if shot. In the point of view of god, we are all equal. Just because he/she is hot doesn't make you ugly. It makes you, You. Don't feel the need to strive to be like someone else. Power may be in numbers, but faces are one of a kind.
"Why am I not popular"
You are popular, but not with that group. Friends are friends. Just because the jocks don't notice you doesn't mean you have no friends. Look at your facebook, myspace, or any other social networking sights. You have thousands of people to be your friend. The "In" crowd is just a group of stereotypical kids who are probably half as fun as you! Take charge, challenge the norm and make your own friends. People who like you for who you are! People who get your off brand humor. Those are the people that matter. Be your own popular group!
"Why won't they stop picking on me!?"
The chances are is that you have been bullied at least one time since beginning middle/high school. Lord knows I have! The best advice I can tell you is ignore it. Just because they have something to pick on you for doesn't mean it means anything! Sure you are short, but think of it in a positive way! You are not short you are fun sized! Take that critique with a grain of salt. Don't let those kids ruin school for you! They just want to look cool and tough. They are probably hiding somethings of there own. Just ignore them. They are not worth getting upset over. Just be strong and ignore those jerks. They don't know you. How can they judge you?
My final words on this issue is. Be yourself. In the end you are the only person you have to please. If you are sad because you think you are unattractive, look in the mirror and say things that are beautiful. It sounds cliche but it is a very good way to see how lovely you really are! I hope that if you read all the way through this it was helpful in any way!
If you have a question you'd like to submit for me to help with send it to me at
[ reach.zach.davis@gmail.com ]. You will remain anonymous, unless you want me to post your name. If you do, just say the word and I will post your name. Thank you again for reading! I hope you got some help

-Zachary J. Davis